There were times when I felt the urge to pick my phone and call you, then I would realize I didn't have your number anymore. When we started out, I was happy,at least I thought I was at that particular moment, now, looking back, I was just scared of you. Maybe in the beginning, before the relationship, when I used to look at you from afar, I loved you then but when we got together and the high was over, realised it wasn't as I'd thought it would have been. I still stayed, cos I thought I was in love...or maybe I was. I'm not sure anymore.
Back then, I would do any and everything you wanted; even if I hated it. For you everything was a go, it was toxic and I knew it.
I remember our first fight. When I asked you about that girl and you lied, then preceded to get mad at me for asking about someone whom from all indications, you were in a relationship with. I remember I had to apologise. You told me you had nothing to do with her,that she was your very good and close friend. I knew better and so did you. Looking back, I think I always wanted to believe you, anything you said was it for me.
Funny thing was, you always made feel like you didn't like it when the other guys spoke... like you cared what happened to me. I was onto you, but I chose to turn a blind eye and believe you.
Then the day came when all of your lies caught up with you.me. her. Went to visit you because I hadn't seen you in class and thought you might be sick. Met you lifting weights outside of your room, then you told me to go inside, your 'friend' was inside. She and I got to talking and I brought up the topic of you guys being friends, but she stopped me in my tracks when she said she wasn't friends with you but rather your girlfriend. What ever happened after felt like a blur; how I managed to get on the motor bike to my place still amazes me to this day. CHECK OUT THE NEXT POST FOR CONTINUATION.....xo
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